Step into the last option list

Sadly, things didn’t work out as what I expected. I had a terrible stabbing pain again that I couldn’t get out of my bed. (Crap! Again!!) I lied on my bed screaming and shouting on and off that I thought I would feel better but the pain didn’t go away. (That lasted for more than one hour). So I went back to visit my gynae (Coincidently that day I was supposed to visit him to have my second month medication on Duphaston). I could see his eyebrow muscles are tensing up and told me that the pain could be caused by liquid leaking from the cyst. (meaning the cyst could be ruptured) The saddest thing was my left ovarian cyst had grown larger into 6+cm and another smaller right ovarian cyst was found. (Oh my Lord! How could this happen to me??!!) Anyway, I was given medical leave and asked to stay on bed for three days and I had to monitor the progress of the pain myself. The hope for the perseverance in improving my condition using medication had shattered into pieces when my gynae told me that I had no choice but to go for surgery (that was the last option he could do for me). I’d spent 8 months to battle with dirty evil endo monster in my ovary and I was confused and sad whether I had made the right choice previously to have surgery right away so I wouldn’t have so much pain with the side effects of injections and pills or I believed that surgery was not an option and I could get better with other alternative treatments. There was once when mum asked me “Do you regret with the choice of not doing surgery way before that” and I said “No regret, mum”. I didn’t have much time to think whether I was right or wrong but was busy preparing myself for surgery. (I remembered my first surgery done in 20 years ago when I was 5 years old)

My surgery date was set on 1^st of September 2015 around 9 am in the morning. The type of surgery that I would be doing was laparotomy (surgical procedure involving larger incision) instead of key hole surgery aka laparoscopy (involving tiny incision and insert tiny instruments and camera to remove tissue). Thus, the recovery would be longer. I had my blood test done by a very friendly nurse and body temperature checked that I had mild fever. I had my bowel preparation to empty my bowels. I had a lovely call from my bestie to cheer me up and I was dressed in surgery suit. So after all the procedures being performed, I was sent to waiting room and waited for half an hour before my surgery started. My parents were not allowed to enter and had no choice but to wait outside. (Poor mama and papaL) I didn’t feel alone as there were two patients next to me.(an old lady and a malay man) I was shivering in cold (FYI my cousin told me that the low temperature was to kill bacteria). There was nurse coming on her way to check my name and other info and another lady came to me and she was an anesthesiologist. After all the torturing waiting, finally it was my turn and I was sent to the operating theatre to be slaughtered. (LOL) I saw my gynae walking towards me and said “Hello! How are you? You will be fine!” and I was under general anesthesia.

I was not sure whether I had any dreams but I felt I was breathless and choking with tears when I was woken up by the anesthesiologist lady and my gynae. (the lady was standing on my left and gynae standing on my right). I felt something punching on my lower abdomen and the pain was actually coming from the wound (OYEA! I forgot I had my surgery) and I was asked to rest for half hour before being sent back to my ward and was questioned with my pain levels and other information. I had three pain killer injections (maximum doses doc could give) due to my pain tolerance was too low. After all the procedures being done and finally I was able to see my parents and rest in the ward.

I stayed for two nights and I had the toughest two nights in my life. I lost a job on the first day of my surgery (I got a job previously so I quitted but due to my surgery the company couldn’t wait for my recovery and I was jobless) It was pretty amusing that a pregnant Indian lady next to my bed cried for so many times due to pain and worries for her baby and her own health condition and me myself cried for so many times due to losing a job that I really looking forward. Anyway, the toughest person ever was my mum (she insisted to sleep with me for two nights and took very good care of me) The worst pain ever that I ever experienced was changing the wound and also had flames stuck somewhere in my throat to cough it out and also laugh.(I tried not to laugh but smile) I was very happy to receive flower and fruit basket from the lovelies and warm regards from family and friends. The left ovarian cyst (also named as chocolate cyst) was finally removed and I saw a round red color egg liked shape (like red meat internal organ) in a plastic bag and that was the evil endo monster, my left ovarian cyst. The right ovarian cyst was very small and the doctor removed it during surgery. Sample of my chocolate cyst was sent for testing and it took about two weeks to know the result.

The second day of my post-surgery, I was given another injection called Lupron 22.5mg and was injected into muscle once every 3 months. (no period for 3 months) This injection used to treat prostate cancer (not only endo) and had some unwanted side effects that I encountered like tiredness or weakness, joint pain, hot flush, nausea, numbness and was quite suffering to have pain at both areas at the same time (my wound and my injection site). I was given pain killers and antibiotics and I was amazed by my appetite that I could eat much that I expected. I was then discharged and given MC for a month and told to follow up two weeks later. My recovery in 2 weeks was good (although I walked like a turtle that myself couldn’t stand of) and the wound was nicely healed. The report shown no malignancy was found and the interpretation from the report shown that it was endometriotic cyst. So!! I’M OFFICIALLY a part of ENDOMETRIOSIS MEMBER from that time onwards (YAY OR NAY, I’m officially yellow sister!) and I was told to follow up 3 months later. I was advised to get pregnant (if I found the right person) as the endo monster could be coming back again in months/years and I was not encouraged to have surgery again. (I don’t want that again!!) Thank God the stitches at my wound could dissolve themselves naturally without removing manually. (Thank God!!!!)

(left ovarian cyst was growing larger and larger..sighh)

(I took a picture before my surgery)

(Look at the evil endo monster ovarian cyst) (6cm)

(Pretty right??!)

(saline drip after my surgery)

(dinner set in the hospital)

(Healthy breakfast on bed during my post-surgery recovery period)

From the journey, I………

• Can feel how suffer it is to go through post-surgery period when having hard time doing everything like walking, sitting, sleeping, bathing (couldn’t imagine how hard it is for an elderly grandma/or pa to encounter surgery)
• Get to know a lady who had same condition with me (same injection as well) and the cyst came back after the injection stopped and it grew bigger every month. She did 6 operations in 10 years. (omy ><) (trying to keep believing that things will work out and be happy)
• Look into 5 misconceptions about endometriosis 
• (a) It's all in your head (go and check if you experienced the symptoms)
• (b) It's contagious (definitely NO!)
• (c) Pregnancy will cure endo (some doctors did ask me to get pregnant asap, maybe it works!)
• (d) Painful periods are normal 
• (e) Hysterectomy will cure endo (there is no cure and endo monsters can develop outside the uterus)

Anyway, here I am, sharing my endo journey with you guys and don't forget to help me check your boobies (for breast cancer awareness) and remember that having severe period pain is NOT NORMAL. Do visit your doctor if necessary :)

Have a nice day!

Love,

Jer